Wedding Blues

No worries. I am doing good.
The part about you on my blog was actually written on a happy note. Hindi lang siguro ganun ang dating because of the first entry.
You don't have to defend yourself to me.I will never ever think that you are getting married for the wrong reasons. Had it been that way, e di sana dati pa diba? It shouldn't have taken you 6 years for that.
I am happy for you. Truly I am.
I may be in a situation right now na medyo kakaiba pero the world doesn't stop there.
Even if I am in misery, I can be happy for other people. Lalo na at isa sa mga best friends ko.
Again, I am happy for you.
I am wishing you and *** all the best.

Love you too!


Hi Ma-an!

How have you been? I just read your blog, reason why i am messaging you now. I don't want to assume or anything, but the last paragraph you wrote hit me. Maybe because I know I have said it to you guys some time ago, and maybe because when *** learned that things are going well with me and ****, she also brought that up. That I once said "I want a wedding, not a marriage."

I don't know what the point of this whole e-mail is. Maybe to defend myself? Maybe to assure you guys that I am not getting married for the wrong reasons? Or maybe to just simply share with you the joy I am experiencing now. You are, after all, one of my best friends. =)

When I said that I wanted a wedding and not a marriage, i did mean it at that time. I wasn't involved with anyone when most of my friends were. I was coordinating weddings when i was
nowhere near having one. It was a depressing situation to be in. I said i wanted a wedding because i was passionate about weddings. Goodness, i've had mine all planned out since i was in high school! I have pictured my dream wedding even before i had my first boyfriend!

But now that things have turned around and things have fallen into place, i know without a doubt that i would rather have a perfect marriage than have a perfect wedding. Now that i know who i am supposed to spend the rest of my life with, i no longer care about how the wedding will turn out (okay, well, not entirely true, hehe), but i do care a great deal about how were going to make the marriage work. please don't think i am getting married for the wrong reasons. and more importantly, you being happy for me and being happy about the decision i have made would really, really, really mean a lot to me!

let me just end this e-mail by saying that you too should not fret. You have found the perfect partner in John. that's half the battle, Sweetie. I am pretty sure that you are not on your way to
anywhere else but to marital bliss. Cliche, but i know that it will happen all in God's perfect time.

'Love You! =)

Everybody's Getting Married...

except for me.


Bitter? A bit. Jealous? A bit.

John and I had been together for 3 years now. Pero up until now, I am not hearing any wedding bells. If it's any consolation, we talk about it, in passing. So no definite plans or whatever as of yet. But I did ask him once if he has plans of marrying me. I asked him if this relationship is leading us to the altar. Nagulat nga sya cos I was so dead serious. Sabi nya, ako na daw yung babaeng nakikita nya na papakasalan nya. A sigh of relief diba. I mean, why go through everything kung sa wala lang din naman mapupunta.

I've got friends who are already married. It didn't take them 3 years to have the wedding.
At meron pang iba na kakakilala lang and yet, ikakasal na sila.

I don't know why I am blogging about this. Probably because I want to get it off my system.
Honestly, hindi ko alam.

Bahala na nga si Batman.



+++

I have a friend who once said,

"I want a wedding, not a marriage."


And now, she is getting married.


I wish her all the best.

At Random...

JANUARY 15th --

CCAP's Battle of the Bands at Glorietta. John and his bandmates. They placed 5th and the Finals will be on February 5th. NBC Tent daw, not final though.

Met up with one of my best friends. Good to know that she is happy. One word to describe her, in BLISS.

JANUARY 6th --

First kita-kits with what's left of the Bangags. Dinner at Friday's. As always, lamang na naman si Jovee sa mga solo pics. Hoy! Bagong taon na. Magbago ka na!

JANUARY 7th --

Threesome. After dinner, went to spend the night in Novaliches. Inom konti ng beer.

Weirdest Looking Santa --

housed in Makati Med. Need I say more? Lol.

JANUARY 8th --

First visit to Makati Med for the year of 2006. Not a good way to start the year. Nothing serious. Sobrang sakit lang talaga ng throat ko.

Buhay pa ko!

Buhay pa naman ako. To those who are missing me, to those who are looking for me, andito pa ko. Buhay pa naman.

In a gist...

Christmas was spent with John and his mom.

New Year was spent at home.

John and I had our Third Anniversary last January 1st.
Oo na, cheesy.
Anniv on New Year?
E ganun e.
Love happened.
It doesn't choose the date, the time... it just happens.

***

I got my wish for Christmas. I'm still with Recruitment. We're extended until February. Woohoo!

***

There are these women who are tagged as Jerk Magnets. Ako, I guess you could say na I am the Jerk Magnet's friend slash morale booster.

As what I always tell these Jerk Magnets, sila lang din ang makakatulong sa sarili nila.
No matter how sad the story is, they always have the option of being miserable and depressed or being in a better place.

I know it's sad to be breaking up with someone you really love.
I was through that before. It hurts like hell.

But you have a choice. Hurt like hell or get over it.

The first step to healing is getting over that person.
It's always easier said than done, I know.
Afterall, it's not easy to forget someone who has been a part of your life.

But then again, you need to move on.

It's painful. There's no other way. Try embracing the pain. Next thing you know, it's over.


Malayo sa bituka yan.
Wala pa naman ako nababalitaan na namatay dahil sa ganyan (unless of course, mag-commit ng suicide, which is so beneath everything naman)...

Kaya mo 'yan, ikaw pa.